a few little chuckles…

A married Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest, “I almost had an affair with another woman.” 
 

The priest said, “What do you mean, almost?” 

The Irishman said, “Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped.” 
 
The priest said, “Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You’re not to see that woman again. 
For your penance, say five Hail Mary’s and put $50 in the poor box.” 
 
The Irishman left the confessional, said his prayers, and then walked over to the poor box. 
 
He paused for a moment and then started to leave. 
 
The priest, who was watching, quickly ran over to him saying, “I saw that. You didn’t put any money in the
 poor box!” 
 
The Irishman replied, “Yeah, but I rubbed the $50 on the box, and according to you, that’s the same as putting it in!” 
 
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Donation 
 
Father O’Malley answers the phone. “Hello, is this Father O’Malley?” 
 
“It is!”

“This is the IRS. Can you help us?” 
 
“If I can!”

“Do you know a Ted Houlihan?” 
 
“I do!”

“Is he a member of your congregation?” 
 
“He is”

“Did he donate $10,000 to the church?” 
 
“He will.”
 

Gas prices: how high can they go and when is enough enough?

First I never thought I’d see the day the prices reach $3.00.  Then they did.  But I did a double-take the other day when I saw the price at the pump listed at $3.52! 

What I don’t understand is how the price fluctuates from Cumberland Farms to Cumberland Farms.  In one town you have it at $3.52.  You go two towns over and the CF there has it at $3.49.  Go figure. 

Each day as I drive to work I hold my breath as I pass the pumps wondering  how high it’s going to be.  And I also wonder when, if ever, the prices will once again descend.  We can only hope.

How will you spend your rebate check?

It seems retailers are brainstorming to get people to spend their rebate checks on their merchandise.  Personally, I’m putting it towards bills. 

But if I didn’t have any bills to pay?  Hm…I’d probably just sock it away in my savings account.  Okay, maybe I’ll treat myself to a little trip to Mohegan…but just a little one….

Can’t blame me on this one!

It seems my “nemesis” is now complaining of someone allegedly creating a My Space page all about him.  As much as I’m sure he’s thinking I’m behind it, I’d love to tell him that he can’t blame me for this one!  In fact, I think if he looks closely at his current FB page, he’ll find the culprit among them. 

What I’d love to tell him is that he’s going to need a court order in order to obtain any My Space info, i.e., IP addresses, etc.  They just don’t hand the info out.  I only know this from Grand Jury experience.  And even then a jury may have to agree to let My Space release the info.  Which probably will not happen, as there is such a thing as “freedom of speech”.  My “nemesis” should just shut up, enjoy the extra publicity and deal with it.  It’s a nice page; there is nothing bad written about him there.  And he’s got great friends, among them Elvis and The Beatles!

I really hate it when “rock stars” whine!  Especially old washed up ones!

What is sure to become a very interesting return…

Most recently the former drummer for a once popular rock band from the 80’s came out of the wood work to announce his “comeback”. 

I give the guy credit.  When he was touted from the band he was going through a rough time in his life.  There have been a lot of misconceptions over what exactly happened and how his departure from the band really came about.  Most believe he just left on his own to pursue other musical interests.  That eventually did happen.  However, I was told several years ago from someone who is friends with some of the other band members what really happened.  This nature-loving, clean-living private drummer got hurt during a charity softball game and to deal with the pain, got turned on to drugs, eventually leading up to heroin.  The lead singer of the band, someone who never got along with him in the first place, led the crusade to remove him from the band.  From my understanding, the other band members didn’t really have much say. 

Fifteen years and several pawned awards later, this man has cleaned up his act, has formed a new band and is ready to talk.  He states he is even writing a book to let “fans” of his first group know the truth.  I just wonder what the lead singer is going to think when he finds out.  Should be interesting!

The moment I’ve been waiting for…THE NEW KIDS ARE REUNITING!

I heard the news this morning…NKOTB are reuniting!  Could it be true?  Yes, it is!  They’re even going to be on Today–today (Friday).  This is the next best thing to my old Donnie rag doll!

Was I a New Kids fan in the day?  Yes, I admit I was.  I thought it was cool they were from Boston, were around my age and the Knight brothers were born at the same hospital in Worcester that I was (back when Hanehman (sp) was just Hanehman and not part of UMASS).  I think I actually joined the ranks of New Kids fans because of my much younger sisters.  Or maybe it was I who turned my sisters on to the New Kids.

My sisters had all the New Kids barbie dolls and they all ended up with either missing heads or legs.  Jordan would be riding around naked in Barbie’s pink convertible while Joey sat in the passenger seat, dressed but headless and helpless. 

While I had all the New Kids cassettes (yes, cassettes–from the very first one–the one before “Hangin’ Tough” to “No More Games”–even the cheesy Christmas one–I still have them all), my sisters had the videos “Step By Step” and “New Kids Live” (I think that’s what it was called–it was after all a live New Kids concert). 

My favorite?  Donnie.  I liked ‘em bad in my twenties.  I’m proud to admit I had one of those huge Donnie pins, a poster, some books, T-shirts, a New Kids pillow case and of course my Donnie rag doll.  Due to the fact that during this time I also had my first serious boyfriend and I was 21 or 22, I hid my Donnie collection in the closet and eventually disposed of my memorabilia.  Wish I had it now!

I even remember the cartoon and sadly I would get my ass out of bed on Saturday mornings just to watch it!  Yes, this of a then 21 year old woman!  Here I was with a prestigious job and a car and I watched the New Kids cartoon! lol!  Worse yet, I took my sisters to their concert.  I went twice, taking one of my sisters each time!  They were only six and seven at the time.  And we all proudly wore our New Kids T-shirts after the show.

My most memorable New Kids experience came after their appearance on “Arsenio Hall”.  There had been a controversy of whether they had lip synched during the show.  After reading an article in a Boston newspaper regarding this, I wrote a letter to the editor expressing my disdain.  Unbeknownst to me, the letter was printed.  I only discovered this after I received a phone call from a student at BU who was trying to convince me to join her New Kids rally in support of the guys. 

“Where did you get my phone number?”  I asked her.

“Information.”

“What’s this regarding?”

“Your letter in the paper.”

Uh-huh.  Nice of them to tell me they were going to print it.  Needless to say, with my boyfriend sitting there listening to me chat with this over-the-top New Kids fan, I was sure I wouldn’t be attending any New Kids rally.  At this time the New Kids were on the down side anyway.  

So, if Joey (oops, sorry…he’s married and a father now…likes to be called Joe), Jordan, Jonathan, Donnie and Danny come my way on this reuniting tour, will I go?  You’d better believe your New Kids pajamas I will!